In December of 2019, just before the holidays, a labor of love many years in the making finally saw the light. I gave birth to a book! Today, I committed to the process of spreading its message and getting into the hands of other cancer patients.
On the surface, Mama, What Color is Your Love? is a children’s story about colors. Go a layer deeper and you will learn about the love of a mother and her child as witnessed in the beauty of the world around them. But go to the root you’ll see that it’s really a love letter to anyone who has ever wondered how to make love visible or ensure their love is felt, even after they are gone.
On the surface, Mama, What Color is Your Love? is a children’s story about colors. Go a layer deeper and you will learn about the love of a mother and her child as witnessed in the beauty of the world around them. But go to the root you’ll see that it’s really a love letter to anyone who has ever wondered how to make love visible or ensure their love is felt, even after they are gone.
You see, when the idea for this book was born, I was afraid to die. My life had been abruptly upended with an aggressive cancer diagnosis. What made this especially terrifying was the idea of leaving behind a toddler who wouldn’t remember me after I was gone. I couldn’t fathom leaving him, not having him know how I loved him with every ounce of my person. What could I leave for him to remember me by? Tchotchkes? Pictures? Gifts? Letters?
In the end, it was this same child who came up with the question that gave me my answer. One day, before going to sleep, he asked me, “Mama, what color is your love?”
Honestly, I had no idea the answer to this question, but I knew it was the solution I was looking for. I knew if I wanted him to truly know that my love was going to be with him forever, wherever he went, whatever I gave him couldn’t be a singular tangible “thing.” But color, color is everywhere, the same as love. It surrounds us. It makes our world vibrant, alive, beautiful. All we have to do is look around us to see reminders of love in all its beauty, all its wonder. Anything and everything can be a reminder of love, even after the person sharing the love is long gone from the world. All you need is to know where to look.
I found the perfect illustrator in Shannon Hunt, a lifelong friend and brilliant artist whose own father passed away from cancer when she was very young. Together, we hope we have given the world a story you can use. Whether you are looking for a way to teach a small person about colors or the beauty of our natural world, or you’re looking for a way to remind someone in your life that love is omnipresent in the face of our own transience, we hope you enjoy Mama, What Color is Your Love?
